Redemptive Creature of Pain

Deep within lies a slimy, pathetic Monster writhing in pain. We all know him. His own worst enemy, is he, only conscious of misery. He cannot see beyond himself. Pain lingers about him, like so many tangled wires jumbled in static giving off fumes.

Pain is his cousin who never goes away only to be dealt with in twisted anger, self victimized, ostracized. Unreachable, untouchable, unworthy of redemption, he refuses to break through his self-imposed barriers; believes he is helpless
against the invisible foe.

Pain is unacceptable, not a legitimate entity. Pain has planted thorny swords of barbed wire, preventing easy access. Pain wrapped in self loathing cannot move or grow. Tears of self pity, cover him like unshakable slime, his fears convincing him the pain will not desist. Self-flagellation wounds ooze thickly. He tells himself "it's all I am meant to be, just pain"

A most despicable Beast, unworthy and shamed,
is but one who needs tender love and healing nonetheless. Dear Beastie, I come to you, my hand outreached to comfort,
yet, you stab me with your lightning bolts, unwilling as a cowering porcupine. You can only unleash your pain yourself, I see. Did you know I was once like you?

By soothing voice, I sing to you. By soft-coated whispers, I encourage you to breathe, and unwind the chains you have wrapped about yourself. Hiding in the poppies to cover the pain, locked you further away from the truth of you, brought increased harm and alarm and no remembrance of who you are.

And so, I calm my mind, my aching heart, my stress-filled body to accommodate your need for undivided attention, your need for redemption from your false beliefs to embrace what I once thought was the enemy. Without your spiky armor, you appear quite harmless.

With your oozing wounds placated, your tears dried away, you are quite a cuddly creature and purr readily when petted.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedicated to the dark within us all.

Watching Old Video

.

Dad's habit

patting his bald head

Mom rubbing her sore leg

How straight is his profile

from nose to chin...

that "stiff upper lip"

he always said to keep.

How tired she looks

saying goodbye

them walking... holding hands.

Child Writing

I've written all my life in some form or another, not realizing there was something I could "do" with my writing for quite some time. It wasn't until my daughter, in her teen years. let me know she was intimidated by my writing skills that I wondered why she had such feelings, a perfect A student, who wrote very well and was literally a genius.

From that time I began to share my writing with friends, and went back to college taking courses getting a few A's myself. The rewards encouraged me to continue writing, mostly memoir and family history with a scattering of poetry and children's stories. Some have been tossed, and some are filed away in boxes in a closet.

Only recently have I stepped out of the mold of my self imposed writing, and started to make efforts to submit my work. I'm receiving tutelage from two local Santa Cruz authors. I don't feel serious with them yet, only the sense that rubbing elbows might bring me some luck. University of Santa Cruz has an opportunity where Seniors (read: old people like me) can attend classes under their Lifelong Learners program. So, that's another big step I'm taking. Hopefully, I will get into the class of our local Poet Laureate and get more elbow rubbing.

What set me on this enjoyment of writing started many years ago when my sixth grade teacher asked me to help her with the school annual literary magazine. It was a conglomeration of poems, stories and artwork submitted by third to sixth grade students. It was a big production. We were very proud of it.

Mrs Rae taught me how to type up the stencils in preparations for the mimeograph machine which, thank heavens, she wouldn't let me use. I was a terrible typist, probably ten words a minute, and made many mistakes. She patiently showed me how to fill them in with correction fluid. I hated doing this, and eventually she let me off the hook.

Having been exposed to the other children's submissions, I decided I could write as well as anyone else and produced what I considered an epic poem. It used up a whole page, and Mrs Rae was full of praise. I wish I still had it, or at least a copy of the 70th Street School Banner with my poem in it. I wrote completely in rhyme an experience based upon "What I Did Last Summer".  I had an infestation of bees set up housekeeping in my bedroom. I don't remember anything I wrote except how I managed to fancifully describe myself as sitting like a Buddha in order to be still until the bees moved on and I could get away. 

For the Wonder of a Tree

She stands
With breezes teasing
Long leaves dripping after rain
Named Willow,
an old and venerable one
verdant in the summer sun
She survives

Spending winter naked
Withdrawing into herself
to her roots
She hibernated
And slept while cold death
Bit at her branches
Yet she lives

By some miracle
She awoke
At the appointed time
The mystery
Known only to her
and her mother, Nature

She revels in this season
Shading all who pass by
Bending to the winds
In a private dance
The two repeat together
She’s a feast for the eyes
Against the turquoise skies

Yet she weeps

by Elizabeth Munroz

Are you ready to enter a writing contest?

I just got an email informing me Writer's Digest has announced it's now time for their annual writing competition. I'm signed up for their free email membership. This is legitimate.

Grand prize is $3,000 and a trip to New York for 3 days and 2 nights.

The announcement says:

"While you’re there, a Writer’s Digest editor will escort you to share your work with four editors or agents."

Now, I don't know if that means you get to show them what you wrote that won you the contest, but, I sure hope it means that you can share with them other writings you've created. Wouldn't that be cool?

They have ten categories in which you may enter:

1. Inspirational Writing (Spiritual/Religious)

2. Memoirs/Personal Essay

3. Magazine Feature Article

4. Genre Short Story (Mystery, Romance, etc.)

5. Mainstream/Literary Short Story

6. Rhyming Poetry

7. Non-Rhyming Poetry

8. Stage Play

9. Television/Movie Script

10. Children's/Young Adult Fiction

Here's the link for further information.
http://writersdigest.com/annual

When you click on the link, a box will come up asking you to sign up for Writer's Digest magazine subscription. Don't let it deter you.  If you're not interested, just close it out with the almost invisible x in the upper right corner of the box. Otherwise, sign up and enjoy. (May I have your old copies?)

You might find it advantageous to sign up for the free emails, as I did.

Even if you are not ready to submit something you have written, read through it all to get an idea of how things work. This will save a lot of stress in the future when you have finished something you might want to enter somewhere and find you have only a day to do it. You must read through and methodically follow instructions, otherwise your perfectly wonderful and publishable manuscript might be scrapped, because you didn't dot an i, or cross a T, or specify that this is a memoir and not a magazine article, for example.

Here's an something that caught my eye from their site where I can think things might get confusing and throw things off if one does not read all the fine print.

"Q: Are pen names allowed?
Pen names are fine. Write your pen name on all forms etc. so there is no mistakes on credits. Please be advised that we only need your real name if you are chosen as a winner (in order to issue prizes)."

Please note: I thought it was interesting that they used "is no mistakes" instead of "are no mistakes". If this is any indication of editing skills....

Also, before you go buying any of the books they offer for sale, check with Amazon or half.com, for better prices. If you don't mind purchasing a used book instead of new, sometimes you can get them for a penny plus postage. One other site I just love for obtaining books for next to nothing is

http://www.paperbackswap.com/

If you sign up for paperbackswap, you can reference me by name as the person who referred you. I would appreciate that very much, as then I would earn a point.

If you have something to add to this, please comment.