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Welcome

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Make yourself at home. Put your feet up. Grab your favorite beverage and prepare to enjoy the reads.
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Sunday

My Personal Opinion

I think we are often lead, but do not always follow. Like a mother walking down the road with her child, there reaches a point where she has to let go and let the child walk without being clinging and fearful.


The child might get distracted by the pretty seashells along the way and hang back while mother stands aside and watches. She wants the child to follow, but also allows the child to explore the world, and then... oh no! the child has been scratched by a thorn! Why wasn't mother there to prevent it? But, she is watching and cares and wants the to learn what to value and what to be careful of. Sometimes we just have to learn the hard way to take care of ourselves, knowing that mother is not too far away.


I think that we have a path in life to take, like if you were to travel from Belgium to Spain. There are a lot of things to see on the way, a lot of interesting signs that say turn left at the corner and go down that road and you will see the amazing beach.


And so we go on those side roads, knowing we have a goal to reach, and maybe we have a flat tire or the car needs repair, but yes, we do gain something from our experience, and so ultimately we get back on the path.  I think there are so many signs along the way where we are diverted and gain experiences both painful and enjoyable and it is all part of what we do to grow.


I think the tragedies in our lives are part of the path. Sometimes we stumble a lot on those rocky paths. I look at depression as my going down a steep path with rocks in the way. And so, all I can do is hang on and try to keep myself balanced and composed as best as possible while I am sliding down, sometimes falling down. And at the bottom, there is my old friend, my old enemy... Depression. It's like walking through mud, so it is difficult to get back on the path to the original goal. We could just curl up in the mud and die, or we can keep trudging through it until we can find a foot hold to start climbing up again. It's very hard to climb upward on a steep path, but it sure does strengthen us.

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I took the first three photos at Capitola, California and the fourth one in my own backyard. Destiny is collecting seeds from the dried poppies.

Fulfillment

Re-write
Life is so fleeting, and going through it without a goal was the way I lived. Then I died. Had a near death experience. It gave me pause, and made me somewhat unsettled straddling two worlds. I became a seeker, never finding the exact thing I was seeking, not finding complete answers.

But eleven years later when it happened again, it was the kick I needed to stop seeking and just live life with intent, focus on what I want and go after it.

I thought, I want to buy a house, and I did.

I want to have a baby, even though they said it was impossible, and I did.

I want to go to the Grand Canyon, travel the country from one end to the other, and I did.

I want to move to Santa Cruz, California, and I did. 

I want to go back to college and take every class I can. I did that for 17 years.

I want to go be with that Light again. Not a good idea! It sent me back, and made me work harder without the guidance I had previously felt accompany me through life.

I want to learn how to keep faith and wait for that one thing I didn't find. A purpose. Took me a long time to find it.

The one thing I was wanting for so long, the one thing that didn't seem possible came true through the internet. I found others with the very same rare cancer I lived with for so many years. Now I help others get through those tough times. Ah! Peace! I've finally met my purpose in life.

There is nothing more I want.

Calla Lilies in My Garden


I find white flowers very difficult to capture.
These are Calla Lilies


Taken February 17 this year.


Taken December 27 2002


Taken February 17 this year